Bez Valley’s mysterious serpent signs

[mks_dropcap style=”letter” size=”65″ bg_color=”#ffffff” txt_color=”#000000″]I[/mks_dropcap] have stumbled across something a little peculiar, extremely perplexing, and a whole lot of disturbing. I’ve posted a photo before of this sign, and had assumed that a disgruntled white middle-class woman put it up: a tongue-in-cheek response to the serious dumping problem we have in our area.

But things have taken a sinister turn. On my way to register myself as a voter at the local community hall, I spotted a new addition:

Is that a threat or a promise?
Is that a threat or a promise?

Clearly, ‘By Order’ means business. I noticed something else: a plastic barricade with various trash stuck to it (thanks to actual SA Police service crime scene tape) in an artistic style that I can only describe as ‘Dexter-meets-Muti’.

CSI: Bez Valley
CSI: Bez Valley

The journalist in me said that I had to investigate further; the inner responsible citizen said I had to register to vote first. Fighting the urge to discover more, I reluctantly got back into my car and trundled off to the community hall.

I recently subbed a story in one of my community newspapers where an ‘elderly resident’ by the name of Rose was, and I quote, “consumed by curiosity”, thanks to yellow ribbons that someone had tied around trees in Greenside. While I was dutifully filling out my voting form, I thought of Rose. And now I too was consumed by curiosity –  not by who would win the next elections, and not by who I would vote for, but by the mystery sign-maker.

My responsible citizen now appeased, I could continue my investigation.

Back at the barricade, I got out of my car to take a closer look. A massive church service was taking place on a soccer field nearby; the street filled with wailing and echoed Amens. A car guard wearing earphones  lounged on the kerb, his yellow neon vest blinding me in the sunlight. I gave him a nod and went closer. And this is what I saw:

Mix tape; Ted Bundy-style.
Mix tape; Ted Bundy-style.

“Ey. Sissie.”

An earphone now dangling out of one ear, the car guard gestured at my camera. “You taking photos for internet?”

I tell him no. I ask him if he knows who put this here; he doesn’t. I ask him if he knows what this is about; he doesn’t. He makes a forced shivering movement and gives himself an exaggerated hug. “It has bad feeling, sissie. Eish!”

I also see this:

Proof of payment. And that someone is completely bonkers.
Proof of payment. And that someone is completely nuts.
Protection needed.
Nameless faces
Nameless faces
Prayer for Salvation
Prayer of Salvation.
Satan's spawn (yes, that's an ultrasound). Right: random bible verses.
Left: Satan’s spawn. Right: Redemptive biblical verses.

By now it’s safe to say that I have the grils. Then I see the snakes:

Beware. The Snake.
Don’t drink the water. Or piss in it. Or [take a] dump in it. Or something else that I can’t figure out. Ten out of ten for creativity though. And insanity.
I wasn't aware that snakes have a keen sense of smell. But ok.
I wasn’t aware that snakes have a keen sense of smell. I must remember to google that.

What the actual fuck, you may ask? Me and the car guard too. One has to wonder, “Maybe dere’s snake dere” (as he put it). But there’s more – sandbags with obscure words painted on them. I had to look these up in a dictionary, but I now challenge you to work them into random future conversations:

1. imbroglio 

an extremely confused, complicated, or embarrassing situation, eg. “the abdication imbroglio of 1936”
Come to Bez Valley and increase your vocab.
Come to Bez Valley and increase your vocab.

2. farrago

a confused mixture, eg. “a farrago of fact and myth about Abraham Lincoln”
This whole thing is farrago-ing the shit out of me.
This whole thing is farrago-ing the shit out of me.

3. putrescent & 4. feculent


Becoming putrid; Foul with impurities, fecal.

I hate a show off
I hate a show off.

Are you sufficiently freaked out? I am. There was another bag with words written on it but by that stage I was scared that I might become possessed by snake demons. I’m still consumed by curiosity though.  I just hope I don’t get eaten alive [slowly]. My salvation might lie in the fact that I recycle.

13 comments Add yours
  1. what an incredible discovery! i would agree with Gail’s comment that it is an environmentalist. but it’s an environmentalist with too much education and not enough field to fight in…

  2. You right it could be Evil John. Why I thought it could be Lesley is that I think she is a bit of environmentalist I think and this obversely is to stop people from dumping. Where about is this in Bez Valley? Would like to come and check it out.

  3. I just had a thought: there is one person who could’ve done this – Evl John. He hangs around this area – never met him, but he collects trash and makes things out of it….maybe it’s him.

  4. I highly doubt it – her territory is usually Troyeville, and her stuff is usually well-though out and, as far as I understand it, her installations are about beautifying the surroundings, or something the public can actually use and engage with (eg the bed). This… this is just weird and creepy for me. But it could be public art. You have to come check it out and decide for yourself 🙂

  5. You have stirred the crazy inquisitive side of me, I want to don my Inspector Clouseau outfit and go out and explore. LOL

  6. Hey Marelise, a few other people are saying this too. It’s definitely a possibility, just wasn’t first thought that came to mind – it really looks more psychotic than artistic … but then again isn’t art and madness related or something? 😉 Dying, dying to know who it is.

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